End the Silence of Domestic Violence

Trigger Warning: this piece does mention domestic violence.

It’s October. It’s the spooky month, the official start of the holiday season, when we feel the hint of the fall crispness in the air and you see the leaves begin to hit the ground.

But did you know that October is also domestic violence awareness month? It’s a month to raise awareness and raise our voices about this terrible epidemic that plagues far too many people.

It’s a cause that is very close to my heart as I am a domestic violence survivor.

In the United States, nearly ten million women and men become victims of domestic violence each year. Every minute, about 20 people are physically abused by an intimate partner; globally, it’s estimated 316 million women experience some form of abuse each year, and 840 million women and girls have been subjected to some form of abuse in their lifetime.

Many people do not even understand that domestic violence is not defined as being strictly physical abuse. Domestic violence is defined as any type of abuse or extreme control. It is physical abuse, emotional abuse, sexual abuse, verbal abuse, mental abuse, financial abuse, and even spiritual abuse.

Many victims are not even allowed to have access to their own money. They have to ask permission to buy things.

They’re told so many things that are wrong about themselves, so many things they can’t do right. They begin to believe it. Victims learn to walk on eggshells to keep the peace and please the abuser. And whether it’s physical or not, all abuse situations are very hard to leave.

Murder by an intimate partner or family member is not the only cause of death among abuse victims and survivors. The suicide rates among them are four times higher than those who have never experienced abuse. Recent studies show that suicide is higher than murder among survivors and victims.

On average it takes a survivor seven times before they can actually leave an abusive situation for good. That is because it is a complex and drawn out process.

Many survivors and victims, if they leave, are left with no money, no place to go and severe fear of their life or of losing their children. Some survivors had that one defining moment that finally pushes them over the edge to leave, while other survivors plan for months and years.

Sadly, some are caught in that situation the rest of their life, and some are killed.

Over the next four weeks, I will be doing a series on domestic violence. You will hear from two amazing women, Laura and Janey, who have volunteered to share their story. They will talk about the impact domestic violence has on someone’s life in all aspects.

I hope you stay tuned and read every piece, because the only way to stop this terrible epidemic that so many people are currently living through is to talk about it. We must end the silence on domestic violence.

If you or someone you know is in an abusive situation, or has gotten out and needs resources on what’s next, there is help. Please contact any of the following resources below and know that you are not alone. There are many of us out there.

The National Domestic Violence Hotline:

Home

1.800.799.SAFE

Victim Connect Resource Center Helpline

Home

1-855-4-VICTIM

Georgia Coalition Against Domestic Violence

Home

1-800-334-2836

Elizabeth Graves lives with way too many animals and not enough sanity. She is passionate about the arts, especially theatre.  And she enjoys any reason to dress in a costume.